Guilty feet have got no rhythm
July 25th, 2009 by excimerI’m changing the subject.
Guys, you might get angry about papers with ridiculous claims getting into JACS, or papers with allegedly falsified claims, and that’s all well and good. The blog is here to talk about such things should the need arise.[1]
There are more important things than bad science, however, and I need to talk about them here. I need to express my deepest anger and frustration towards an injustice of the highest order I was made aware of only today. This strikes and offends the very core of my being. I shouldn’t even bring it up. I shouldn’t have to. This should not exist. And yet… and yet, it does.
Would someone like to explain to me WHAT IN THE EVERLIVING FUCK THIS SHIT IS?!?! Some shitty post-grunge emo band doing a cover of Careless fucking Whisper? Is nothing sacred anymore? I know the music industry has run out of ideas, and so feels the need to rehash old songs (Beyoncé singing the Ave Maria, anyone?), but, listen. Wham! is completely off-limits. You have no right to impinge upon such art. Seether’s revolting, sonic excrement is akin to drawing a mustache on the Mona Lisa with a crayon made out of the dried fecal matter of a Taco Bell marketing executive[2]. You are not class enough to touch Wham!. You’re not even in the same category. Compare:
Awe-inspiring, truly.[3] So leave Wham!’s music as it was- pristine, 80’s, fabulous. Do a cover of “Come on Eileen” or something. I’m sure Dexys Midnight Runners could use the money. Cause if I hear Lady Gaga or some American Idol-manufactured money machine do some blasphemous cover of “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go,” I’m gonna go-go. Straight to the loony bin. [4]
I’m Excimer, and I approve this message.
[1] …to a point. If ψ*ψ or myself don’t like your contributions to our blog, then they’ll be deleted. Rule of thumb: before you post, ask yourself: “Would an asshole post this?” If so, don’t post it.
[2] yo quiero taco complex
[3] Seriously. Look at George’s hair. Hair has never been as perfect as George Michael’s in this video. And to think, people were *surprised* when he came out of the closet.
[4] I’ll make an exception for Adam Lambert, though.
Beyoncé singing the Ave Maria
Sorry but I just threw up in my mouth.
actually, it wasn’t that bad. but i like beyoncé.
Wow, Seether sounds just like every other POS “rock” band on the radio right now. How in the world did they get Wham! to sound exactly like their formulaic crap rock? It’s practically indistinguishable!
I’ve long been lamenting how my so-called “alternative” station plays this crap all the time now. I like original rock too, but I hate it when they throw that in their playlists along with bands that try to walk some fine line between the two while simultaneously catering to weird teenage angsty bullshit.
1) “How dare they try to end this beauty…”
2) Sarah Silverman does an awesome Amazing Grace. Fantastic beat, and she puts the dogma exactly where it belongs.
The guilty asshole duet – pair it up with 38 Special’s “Second Chance” for a good time (and hope your soon-to be-ex doesn’t have a shotgun handy).
1) Why did Seether think this was a good idea? Please, for the benefit of everyone, get thee to rehab, stat.
2) Do any of these people have an original idea? Alanis Morrisette (sic?) doing Seal’s Crazy? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, over?
No! Alanis Morrissette doing “My Humps”!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=abGQ_ehWm2Y
oh man, alanis’ my humps was amazing. major props to her for that.
And, I of course neglected the duet of underage dating themes: George Michael’s “Father Figure” and Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer”.
George Michael has a song for every occasion, doesn’t he?
Sweet Child O’ Mine as done by Sheryl Crow. Don’t even get me started on what a travesty that was…
I agree, Seether has no business doing a cover of that song. See my comment above on Seether and their ilk in general. That said, not all fucking covers are bad and tantamount to pathetic unoriginality, especially when they highlight rather than mute the qualities of a song. Take one that I recently discovered, CAKE’s cover of I Will Survive. Not ostentatious, doesn’t try to one up the song, put’s the band’s twist on it without completely undoing it stylistically.
To claim that the music business has lost its creativity and rehash old songs…I wish I had your optimism. IMO, its far from being limited to only the music biz. My grocery store has started up “peapod” again–the order your groceries online and have them delivered…didn’t this fail in the mid 90’s? My son plays with washed up anime reformulated versions of transformers and GI Joe, and has gotten over TMNT. The movie biz is formulaic. Don’t get me started on chemistry. Few ideas are actually original anymore. To be honest, claiming NaH oxidizes something is actually original!! (Oh, crap, the 1965 Zapruder reference that points out O2 is needed)… At least my kid will be smart enough that he can pay for my managed elder care bill in the looney bin with excimer.
the last redo I heard that I liked was smooth criminal by Adamant or something…
Then again I’m an old codger that honestly has a 12pack of PBR in my fridge now, time to pop the top…
that was alien ant farm. way to show your age dude- Adam Ant was, like, early 80’s.
Besides, scientists don’t like original ideas anyway- they tend to shun them, at first. Real success requires taking an old idea and doing cute things with it. and, uh, citing relevant work. modesty helps a little, too.
Did they ever do anything else, again?
I like “Hurt” by Johnny Cash and “The Ghost of Tom Joad” by Rage Against the Machine,
On the anime Transformers note, I suddenly miss an original anime robot series, UFO Robot: Grendizer. Ah, the memories: the bizarre flexibility of the robot, the lack fo fidelity to scale, the cheesy sing-along theme… it really takes me back.
The thing is though, originality is a little overrated (just a little). Every story or song relevant to the human experience has been told and sung. The only thing truly original is the twist we put on them and the personal lens we look through when experiencing them.
On second thought, no one should pay attention to my ideas on originality. My internet alter ego is, “The Chemist” for cripes sake. Never mind. Ignore me.
Hmm, the Seether version comes across as a homage – a way to get the only-angsty-rock listening youth of today introduced to a cherished song that has cycled out of the public consciousness. If people like the cover, they’re much more likely to seek out the original.
I’m pretty tolerant of covers, with just a couple of caveats:
1. The cover should be in a different genre or era, so that the song is being introduced to new people, not just cannibalizing the original (exceptions granted for cover bands not recording their versions).
2. As an a cappella vet, I aver that anything can be done credibly with voices only.
3. The cover needs to be done as an homage or subversion. “We think this classic will make you a star, Fading Star/Little Miss Disney Tween” is not an acceptable reason.
4. Minimal musical ability is required. I think Seether passes, at least within their own community. People who do not qualify include Akon and most minors with webcams.
Andy: Literally every song is better a cappella. Name a song.
Dwight: Cherry Pie, Warrant.
Andy: Better a cappella!
Dwight: No! Really?
Andy: Yeah. Name another.
Dwight: Enter Sandman, Metallica.
Andy: Better a cappella.
Dwight: Rebel Yell, Billy Idol
Andy: Aw!! Way better a cappella
Dwight: Really?
Andy: Yeah.
ugh, you know what would make me die happy? someone doing an a capella version of “my girls” by animal collective.
go.
On short notice, here’s a link to a rendition of Leaf House.
http://stereogum.com/archives/video/animal-collective-a-cappella_044311.html
Generally speaking, techno elements (repetition that slowly builds and adds complexity) can be incorporated into a cappella, but work much better on a compressed timeline – for a successful version of My Girls (I’m not much of an arranger, but there aren’t any real barriers) I’d recommend it abbreviated, medleyed with another song or incorporating some serious choreography.
no. as-is. has to be. no excuses.
Oh Andy Bernard… bringing dishonor on the population of people who went to pretentious-sounding colleges and were in a cappella groups.
I wouldn’t claim that a cappella versions of all songs are necessarily superior… just possible.
The songs most improved by a cappella versions are the ones where the original vocalist was technically weak, or where the instrumentation choices get in the way of the song.
btw, we did Metallica, and it WAS awesome… live at least.
Shameless plug: http://resonance.mit.edu/?p=media
The clip of Alanis’ You Oughta Know is particularly good.
there is NOTHING awesome about metallica. NOTHING.
if you coud do, say, opeth a capella…i’d be very impressed. (and not one of their ballads. that’s cheating!)
also, you need to meet my new labmate, who is also into such things. remind me when you get back.
And I’ll have to thank you for prompting me to pay attention to Opeth. F’ing brilliant. I’d figured they were another Angry White Boy Band, like many of the bands I see on t-shirts around town. Now I’ve been listening to Googe/YouTube clips for an hour and a half straight. And since my summer stipend has me up a smidge over what I expected, mayhaps I’ll stop in the record shop tomorrow.
According to one of the radio stations here in Philly, it started as a joke, but they liked how it turned out and decided to put it on the album. Not as bad the Marilyn Manson cover of Sweet Dreams a few years back.
One of the comments I heard on that was that MM just wanted a song where he could say “abuse” a lot.
I like Seether, but this cover is atrocious. Why, oh why? It is a genre switch (as opposed to the Dixie Chicks doing Landslide – doesn’t it seem like a bad idea to do a cover such that he listener can put your work side by side with the original and see your bands’ flaws in Day-Glo yellow?), but that doesn’t make it, like, not suck. Covers are good sometimes, but I hear them so often that they seem like an admission that “no, our band hasn’t got an original thought, but we can’t get paid unless we make something.”
thank you for being the only other person here who admits to liking some Seether.
i agree about the cover, though. godawful!
George Michael is aah so sweet that if I was diabetic my leg would fall off.
Now if you please excuse me, I will go and listen to Rammstein to recover from the trauma
Can we talk about the chick george michael wronged’s blue dress in the video (at around 2:45)? what the christ was that? She must have won a grammy for puffiest sleeves of ‘83 that year, or at the very least some lifetime achievement award for wearing a dress with the largest shoulder:waist ratio ever.
Despite that, George Michael’s hair was styled by God himself. Of that there can be no question.
No, no, no!!! Don’t look at my hair, look at my butt, Look at it! It’s a total circle! It’s a force to be reckoned with! Reckon with it before it DESTROYS you!
before you post, ask yourself: “Would an asshole post this?” If so, don’t post it.
I thought it was the opposite. I thought this was THE destination for all the wronged assholes of the internet, a place where their hurt souls could be assuaged. I am hurt now.
I think I failed that condition on In The Pipeline twice today. i like Dr. Lowe, but I need to hear from libertarians/birthers about the Democrats’ attempts at health care in the same way I need to hear from drug spammers – unless it involves them being torn apart by rabid wolverines and subsequently napalmed, I don’t need to hear them. No, “willful ignorance of reality” does not count as a philosophy – a mental illness, perhaps, or a ticket for a Darwin Award (if we’re lucky), but not a philosophy.
Just had to say I’m glad I came back to check on the comments here: that a cappella version of Leaf House was so fun! I wonder what the audience thought of that one…